Monday 25 April 2011

Arrive Heaven In Style!!!!!!



Okay so I watched this movie last night.. Nigerian movie… pretty much a English/Yoruba movie ( a rare exception).. Basically talking about what happens when one guy died.

The summary of the film is as follows:

So there was this “rich man” who dies and didn’t realise he was dead.. and was still offering money to the angels to let them go. So sha when the Kabiyesi  (which is  one of God’s name in Yoruba.)came in.. I LOOOVEEE the way the Yoruba’s say Kabiyesi. The respect shown is unmistakable. One time the guy called the Kabiyesi a liar… ABOMINATION!!!! The court (I’m guessing these are meant to be the elders in heaven) stood up and started to pacify the Kabiyesi with praise and eulogies.. and mehn.. I tell you.. YOU HAVE NOT HEARD PRAISE UNTIL YOU HEAR A YORUBA EULOGY ahn ahn you sef you will say ahn ahn only one person?!?!… the Yoruba eulogies for God.. hmm one can take like 15 minutes.. they will just be praising God.. not singing  or dancing as in just praising God.. I’ll try and youtube one and put it at the end of it. Well I don’t speak Yoruba so fluently.. (Shamed.com, have to work on that)  anyways back to the point


Sha the guy’s neighbour now came in and we then realise that even though she got into heaven.. it was as if.. she JUST managed to enter heaven.. they now  gave her one “housegirl looking” outfit.. ah! Well she entered heaven but the way they even admitted her into the heaven sef…. After Kabiyesi told her he was disappointed in her for not doing enough to show His work on earth (wow that went deep… that’s gatta hurt, God the personification of Love to tell you he’s disappointed in you.) sha point is she just managed to entered heaven,

Then the guy’s househelp… ahn ahn when the babe landed see praise.. my goodness.. ahn ahn see praise, the house help was just praising..… infact the Kabiyesi now  started to smile… (Kabiyesi’s don’t smile)  AND STOOD UP!!!! *Gasp* any Yoruba worth their salt know that the Kabiyesi’s don’t stand up for nobody, talkless of a mere mortal… … (gheun ghuen gheun) basically the girl’s  praise had moved God..  (my parents then said to me.. look if you’re having problems and you’re praying and asking and doing things.. don’t worry just pause it.. just start to praise God ehn.. He will move Himself and come and enter your situation.. Donnie Mclurkin even supports its with this video..  
Watch from 4.05 (if you are not moved at least by his infectious enthusiasm please get yourself checked!!! when you are not stone) 


Anyways point being, apparently the househelp had tried to preach to the guy  several times and he didn’t listen, and been doing work on earth that she how will I put it, basically she did well for what she was given and her circumstance. (she was not bitter, despite her circumstance..  But she loved God and her heart was right with God) . Kabiyesi now went and told them to dress her up… they dressed her in what was supposed to be her crown and beautiful garments some, supposedly dazzling outfits like that sha.

Back to the main guy who was alternating between threatening Kabiyesi (This man does not fear God, how dare you threaten the Kabiyesi???In the olden days.. you will be killed immediately!) begging him and trying to negotiate with Him (and the elders now started telling the guy, that what is it that you have that the Kabiyesi has not given you.. ehn?)   So at the end of the day, Kabiyesi banished him to the “Land of the Darkness”  (popularly known as Hell) cos that’s where his actions got him..
And that was the end of the story…

Okay it wasn’t really the end but that’s the end of the relevant part.

So my point, to my fellow Christians.. How do you want to enter heaven?

Do you just want to just enter by chance? Just do minimal runz? And just do on the get by and then yeah somehow you get in? you don’t even get a mansion… they will now give you “house girl outfit?”   if on earth you want to be wearing LV and  Burberry by force or fire.. and yet you want to wear some jonzing outfit for the rest of your existence.. no bling on your crown..  ah.. you are on your own mate!. Yeah sure there’s no sadness in heaven and all that, but if you’re going arrive there and spend your eternity there…  you might as do it in style no?  (What I mean is if you’re going to serve God, you might as well do it well right?... right??? )

Or do you want to enter in such a way that when you enter.. that the angels will celebrate your arrival…. Now imagine this situation. Imagine how they welcome the Queen of England somewhere..  now think of something better than that.. yep that’s you entering heaven… ah I won’t lie to you that’s the kind of welcome I want oh.. I am not going lie.. though the first person I want to see when I reach Heaven is Jesus and give him one mighty hug!!!! (ahh the single greatest moment of my existence, when I see Jesus)  but I won’t be so cocky as to say oh that’s definitely the welcome I will get.. I will just do my best.. which is probably not much, and pray that God sees it as something worthy of even His phrase “well done good and faithful servant”, mehn I gats step my game up to get that sha.

To those who are like “yeah whatever”..
Lol let me just tell you this thing now.. God does not accept lukewarm people.. The bible says He WILL vomit you out of his mouth.. I’m not really sure how he will do that, but I’m pretty sure it’s not a nice sight... it’s just like you cooked something for someone and they vomited it in front of you out of pure unsaturated disgust.. ah!!! You yourself you know you will never cook for someone again... now imagine something 100x worse than that.  So please fix up don’t deceive yourself…And think about it..

Everyone, you know places as beautiful as Caribbean’s right? Maldives, Cancun, Barbados, South of Africa and all that jazz... or imagine the most beautiful place in the world.. it was created in 7 days!!! Heaven has been prepped for us for THOUSANDS of years... so you my friend you have absolutely no idea how beautiful Heaven will be, infact our human body cannot comprehend nor handle the heavenly bunzness, So we will get our own heavenly body.. (ah God oh, please let me have pure Brazilian long hair like this ehn? 14 inches.. from my own head oh!!  #jokes).  Personally the thought that something could ever exceed the dream home/life I have in my mind... is beyond me... and believe me, it’s pretty demanding, I’m not even going to bother  making it here on earth.. and mehn  no council tax, no rent, no mortgage, no annoying water bills or whatever.. God has sorted it out.. ahhhh.. I gats go mate... sorry oh I don’t know about you, but that’s where the REAL party is at!!!! Whoop!!

So I leave you with these words..

Don’t just plan to enter heaven.. Let the angels be able to celebrate your arrival into heaven.  

Stay blessed!!! :D :D :D

MsKally

Wednesday 13 April 2011

Random Thoughts off my head... April version

I think the hardest thing to do in some situations is nothing.. sometimes you do all you can.. fight all you can.. pray all you can... at least that way you are doing something.. but doing nothing.. it kills.... slowly.. lol. this is where the virtue of patience comes in.

The worst feeling is not knowing.. not knowing if someone is alive or dead.. now knowing what the outcome of certain situations.. no matter how bad the news is.. once you find out you get to make peace with it, and then you're okay. when you know nothing, there is nothing to make peace with.

What's this new fad with nigerian girls.. asking no demanding.. no threatening for what their father cannot afford... or worse still.. they can't afford themselves for someone else.. even if they had a job.. my goodness.. are you kidding? please slap yourself.

I want to go to baking school.. or take a baking course.. I shall be doing that over the holidays.. time to get my baking groove on..seeing as i love most pastry and all that jazz... and i have a new found obsession with apple and bramley pies with custard.

Memories are a crazy thing.. sometimes you see things that remind you of things that you don't want to remember.. usually the strongest memory tippers for me are songs and smells. wierd i know.. i think we all have that one person we wish we could forget.. i do.. definitely.. a couple of them.. lol. but we gats live. but i think memories if not handled right can define the kind of person one is. maybe i'm wrong.. but i guess you have to take the good with the bad.. but sometimes the bad is not worth the good.. if that makes any sense..

I like the French accent... there's something about the French accent.. it sounds so.. appealing.. lol
especially Luc from brother's and sisters.. and also the French are rather.. passionate *clearing throat* hmm time to look into holidays in France..

more and more girls get away with so much bull these days.. it's surprising.. like really though the things they say.. the things they do.. the way they dress... ohh don't even get me started on that one.. i'm not sure why a girl thinks it's okay to flaunt EVERYTHING especially after she reaches a certain age.. i've been seeing some more more and fb pictures with some girls with their erm.. nipples out.. or about to pop out. i'm sorry is this the new fashion???the line between tacky and sexy becomes thinner everyday.. ah well.. your life my entertainment #shrugs

I wonder why situations which may have been pretty much terrifying to handle or face.. becomes a lot easier when we see or speak to people we love... like you then start to wonder why was i scared so before?

hmm i wonder why that guy thinks that the world is going to end May 21st.. that's interesting.... #nowmusing

in september. most things about my life as i know it.. would have changed.. it's a pretty scary thought.. ah well life goes on


I remember when i used to think smoking was cool.. like french ladies smoking more like.. something bout the elegance of it.. but no worries.. babes are safe.

i need to hear more happy stories.. there's so much narcissm and negativity going on.. like everything comes with terms and conditions and strings.. what's wrong with things just being as it is..  i tried this website recommended by a friend.. lovegivesmehope.com but after a while i was like no really these are just fantasies.. they are not real.. most definitely not.. my friend believes they are true.. but i don't think so..

ah! i have to get to my appointment... #nowloggingoff

 more random thoughts..

i have a particular friend who keeps having what he calls "baby making music"playing round him.. *side-eye* my guy stop that rough play oo.. you know who will kill you if you by mistake have baby mama.. jokersclub.com

Lol at the argument we had the other day.. about who was more likely to make me trip majorly between Tuface and D'banj. i chose d'banj of course.. Tu face reminds me of a local champion sometimes.. okay maybe town champion but whatever.. d'banj is more my type.. but guy needs to lose the shades sometimes..the boys said cos tuface has more baby mamas he's more likely to succeed.. i think not. don't know what do you think?..

Funny how jokes, laughs and smiles of loved ones... family and some "extra individuals" heals wounds we didn't even know we had.. somehow settles my heart and makes me happy.

Asa's new album is actually pretty good.. not my usual cup of tea but yeah.. same goes for Tinie Tempah's album.. i like it actually.

#nowloggingout 

Tuesday 12 April 2011

Reasons NOT to vote for Jonathan.

I got this as a circular this morning.. (courtesy of the Madre again... love you mummy!!) couldn't but help agree more.. though I wasn't even aware of half the facts..

but for a president who has allowed the MEND to resort to means of Bombing, Niger-Delta crisis on the rise... nothing done about the spillages done in the region.. that a governor (Fashola) is credited to have done more than he has done.. and the worst in my opinion is the Jos Crisis going on...so woeful a guy... i wish i wasn't judging but all this obvious things.. ah.. and even being so proud as to refuse to attend a debate that would convince us why to vote him as a president.. i mean for a president to snob his own country per a presidential debate.. i'm sorry i can't even take him seriously..

I haven't really been following the Elections as much as I could have or would have..for Health and Mental Reasons..

No seriously for health reasons... it will just give me hypertension.. anger unnecessarily stressed unnecessarily.. its okay it's not that serious not even getting paid..let me find a job that pays me well first, then i can afford to take on volunteering job such as swallowing Nigeria's panadol (painkillers) for headache that is not my own.  I just pray Nigeria gets a president and government that will put the country in the right directions..

without further ado.. i present the reasons with comments

1. What manner of a president will vote N10bn for 6 federal universities but
vote N30bn for the entertainment industry abi $200m no be N30bn? They say it
is a loan abi na grant to an unstructured industry by the way? Is the
entertainment industry the most endangered? What about the Health and
Education sectors??  

Kally comment.. is this guy for real though.. that's why you see stars like Majela, Ikebe na money and Vic-O (okay fair enough they are not in Nigeria.. but this is just a couple of the few!!!! *RME*

2. What manner of a president will vote 1.3bn for furniture less than a year
after his house was renovated for him to move in and a similar amount spent
by the deceased president? Insensitive and selfish abi??
Kally comment : Greediness.com some people just don't fear God.. SMH



3. What manner of a president will provide 200m intervention fund for the
textile industry and less than one week later lift the ban on the
importation of textile? Very silly!!

Kally Comment: say what now?? I can't shout mehn.. i mean seriously... i need to look into this.. when i have nothing better to do.. which is not anytime soon. 

4. What manner of a president will increase the age of cars from 10 to 15
years as allowable tokunboh cars that can come into the country when
government all over the world are spending billions to eliminate high carbon
based carbon from the society cause of negative impact on the environment?
He wan kill us be that na.

Kally Comment: I'm yet to see how this will benefit him or the country... why stuck in one stage of technology.. hybrid is the future mate. 

5. What manner of President will set up 6 universities and under a silly
reason that every state should have one, created additional three when all
the existing ones are in a state of comatose due to huge underfunding? I am
sure you won't go this way yourself.

Kally Comment: Lol have you seen the state of Nigerian federal universities????!?! Have you seen the calibre of graduates that exist these days?? it is nothing short of amazing.. and NOT in a good way.. and you are going to create more of the same problem, instead of fixing it.. oh dear... Jonathan ooo.. lol

6. What manner of President will waive and allow duty free importation of
Rice into the country, denying us revenue all in the name of politics? Even
baba Iyabo was mad and could not believe that we import rice with so much
local production going on.

Kally Comment: We import rice ke?!?! ah!! lol... Rice that is like water in nigeria.. Rice is our staple!!!

7. What manner of President will ever consider creating an airport in each
of the state of the federation when the existing international not to talk
of local ones are in ruin and taken over by goats and cows? Pls visit kano
international airport at night and see whether you won't have to read psalm
23 for safe landing.

Kally Comment: Lol!!!! at the Psalm 23.. but seriously though.. if you've been to the amount of international airports i've been to. (which is saying quite a few with the best being Dubai's Terminal 3). Nigeria is seriousslllyyyy slacking.... ahn ahn.. my goodness... but we thank God, at least it's indoors, there's light, with the occasional NEPA striking and we don't have to walk amongst our luggage to pick ours up.. (though to be honest that would save us more time!!!!) 

8. What manner of President will spend an entire $4.5bn excess crude oil
account in less than 8 months under the guise that the account is illegal
with absolutely nothing to show for it? Na wa oh!

Kally comment : all i can say is there is money in nigeria... i just need to find it.... well myself and a million other people.. someone told me recently that the Senators earn a lot more than Obama.. unfortunately/fortunately i now have that Western Mentality bout how it's not all about the money... blah blah.. another blog post for this!

9. What manner of President will spend 10bn or 17bn on anniversary with
nothing to write home about? Ghana spent less than N200m and the impact is
still on 2 years later. I still dey vex for this one!

Kally Comment- a major sigh that shook the window of my room.. well not really but you get the point.. as i always say.. EVERYTIME..."it is well... we thank God"

10. What manner of President will under the guise of raising money for
election keep the price of kerosene and AGO at over N130? Na good thing 4 d
masses? Na only no queue @filling station una dey see?

Kally comment - bad enough we don't have light.. but having to pay such a ludicrous amount of money for such... Jonathan.. bet (but) why.. 

11. What manner of president will spend so much money on a fanfare carnival
around the country all in the name of campaign? He no see poor people
without shoes and books to help with that pepper abi? Or are poverty
stricken people no more in existence?

Kally comment - That 72 million naira cake is still on mind yo..... infact for health reasons i will not say anything. this is my reason and i'm sticking to it!!!

I could go on and on. I don't even want to talk about security (Security is a joke!!!! it's just God that protects people in this country.. honestly..), dbanj ( i don't get why this happened that's like what P.Diddy interviewing Obama on his presidential runz.. or worse Souljah boy interviewing Obama.. jokersclub.com smh.. Dbanj should just stick to what he knows best.. Entertaining.. aha!! that he's good.. #nowplaying Endowed Remix) 


debate wey e no attend etc. (1st class snobbers... what d heck Jonathan.. please you snub us.. we might as well bloody snub you.. who do you think you are? irreplaceable.. abeeggg as Beyonce wll say.. TO the left my friend!!! and keep it moving... you're not even serious.. kmt) 

So for me, it's a big NO to GEJ!! 



#nowcripwalkingout to Snoop's Rap on Endowed. 




Saturday 9 April 2011

British Royals And Facebook...

Lol wow No kidding.... lol at the fact that she got drunk and set her profile to private...